I have to apologize my belated submission of the application ...

Please help me improve the following email. Thank you.

Dear Madam,

I have to apologize my belated submission of the application for hostel allowance, whose deadline should fall on 30 Jan 2024 and no late application will be entertained.

However, since I have been extremel busy in managing my office works and dealing with my severe mental problem, I am yet to submit my application on time. Honestly, I once suffered from severe carcinoma of lung several years ago and I am coming down with serious Mentally Disorder, I wish you will kindly accept my late application for the allowance, particularly considering that my days badly affected by the illness, my lifetime is truly numbered as a consequence, and that I have to pay for quite considerable medical fees to survive every month.

Last, my application and supporting documents are already ready to reach your office. I really hope you will proceed my application on ground of compassion. Certainly, I am always delighted to talk to you about my case in depth at your convenience. Thank you.

Hello, and welcome to the forum.

evertonkong said:

Dear Madam,

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Are you certain that the person reading your email is female? If so, do you know her surname and title?

evertonkong said:

late application will be entertained.

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If that is the case, don't you think you're wasting your time?

evertonkong said:

busy in managing my office works

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What does that mean?

evertonkong said:

coming down with serious Mentally Disorder,

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That is vague. Can you provide a bit more information?

evertonkong said:

my application and supporting documents are already ready to reach your office.

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What does that mean?

I don't know about China but in the UK, if you're asking for something to be considered outside of the rules because you have a physical/mental issue, you would need to back that up with a certificate or confirmation letter from a doctor.

If the deadline has, in fact, passed, then I would say that, not "was supposed to be". You could also say you missed the deadline or the deadline has come and gone. That, in fact, was the deadline, but you missed it.

@evertonkong I think you need to make it shorter and to the point.

Dear [Ms/Miss/Mrs + surname, or however you would write the full name in Chinese]

I am writing to ask you to consider a late application for hostel allowance, on compassionate grounds.

I'm aware that the deadline for applications was 30 January 2024, but unfortunately I was unable to apply by the deadline due to some serious medical issues (supporting documentation from my medical team is attached).

I look forward to a positive reply from you. Please feel free to contact me if you need any more information.

Yours sincerely

[Your name]

Attachments: [List of attached documents]

Thank you for your advices.

On the other hand, I want to ask how I can improve the following sentence:

I have been taking the deadline for the hostel allowance application being on 15 Feb 2024 for 30 Jan 2024 when reading the attached application form in the email dated 20 Dec 2023.

Thanks again.

@evertonkong The word "advice" is a noncount noun.

You can't improve that sentence. Discard it.

What do you think "On the other hand" means?

(I have never figured out the purpose of thanking people ahead of time for things they might not ever do.)